Tomorrow is my last day in law enforcement as a profession. I will hand over my badge, credentials, uniforms, equipment (yes the gun too) and walk out no longer a sworn law enforcement officer. It’s really a bittersweet day. I’ve worked so long and hard for this moment, this career change. It was something that only 2 years ago was an idea only now that idea is a reality. The transition is causing me some melancholy feelings. It’s hard because being a cop is a lifestyle, it has to be to work those types of schedules, work holidays, work weekends and sooner or later you see cops more than your family and on top of that, pretty soon all of your friends are cops too. I will begin to rekindle old relationships this weekend, to reconnect with my family and start to get into a new routine.
The good things are my new job seems like a big challenge, which I love a challenge. I’ll hopefully make new friends, learn new things, see new places and perhaps have new opportunities for growth. The bad is that I will have to acclimate to a new culture, have a hard time maintaining meaningful relationships with the friends I have (who are cops) and of course there will be something of a loss in the personal satisfaction that comes with working in law enforcement and the feeling of being part of something bigger than myself.
I’m going to be going through a lot of changes starting after tomorrow, the end of a career, the beginning of a new one, a new degree program at a new school, an unfamiliar work environment in an unfamiliar and new routine. I’m a little scared of course, that’s normal but for just a second I’m also a little sad. I’m sure I’ll feel different tomorrow night after leaving but for now I’m looking at everything around me as if for the last time.