Vanessa is a 24-year-old stay-at-home mom, wife, military spouse, and veteran. She started her online education while she was still in the Navy. After receiving an honorable discharge, getting married, and having two beautiful girls in two years, she is still going strong with her education at Ashford University. She is currently doubling up on classes with hopes to attend graduation December 2009 with a Bachelor's in Business Administration.

In everyone's life there are people who can influence you, who you are continually exposed to and who can affect your attitude towards getting your degree. These people can sometimes make or break you in your success in school given enough time or if they have enough influence. As such it is important that these people in your life understand what you are trying to accomplish and they should be supportive. However everyone should evaluate how much influence someone else has over their own attitudes regarding what they do, you may be surprised at how much or how little others influence what you do or how you feel about what you do. I have listed them in order of how they personally affect me and in order of influence.
- 1.) Wife (or perhaps in your case husband). It is vitally important that your spouse understand what you are trying to do, agree with what you are trying to do and support you in what you are trying to do. This person has a lot of influence over your life because; quiet frankly, you are sharing a life with them. They should have influence on your choices. If your spouse doesn't support you then your marriage will suffer or your success as a student is doomed, or possibly, both. Make sure your spouse both agrees and is aware of the sacrifices that you and they will have to make for you to go to school. For example they will share any debt you incur, be an empathetic ear whenever you get stressed out and of course they will have to sacrifice time with you so that you can pursue your education.
- 2.) Your family, such as your brothers, sisters, mom, dad, etc. can have a lot of impact on your decision to go back to school. They shouldn't however have more of a say than your spouse, anyone who is married should need no explanation as to why but if you do, see a marriage counselor. As for family, a lot of times family can offer good advice if they have been to school themselves or if little else, offer you a pep talk when you need it for a little boost in your drive to completion. Negativity is contagious however and I know that a lot of us (not specifically me of course) have family that will beat you down when you're at your weakest. Now it isn't essential for your family to support you as it is for your spouse to, but it is essential for you to know whether or not they can be a source of strength for you or whether they will simply drag you down when you need their support.
- 3.) Friends are like family with one exception, you don't have to keep them in your life if they get out of hand. Friends likely are the first to take the biggest hit when it comes time for you to spend time with them vs. doing school work. Most true friends will understand, but some friendships may be threatened. Are you ready for that? If not, your friends can put time obligations on you that you cannot meet and be effective as a student. Friends can be a huge drain but probably aren't going to be a decisive help. It is good to have supportive friends to just vent with if nothing else.
- 4.) Your boss can be a factor. All of those extended hours, short deadlines and mandatory overtime can play havoc on your educational obligations. Is your boss supportive of your desire to earn your degree? If so, let them know if they can help and how. Can you do some work at home? Can you get hours that are more in line with your obligations? Does your company pay for school? Etc. If your boss is dismissive of your going back to school, so what? So long as the job will allow for you to do what you need to do for school and your family, you're golden. If not, it may be necessary for a job change. I find that your boss has the potential to greatly increase your ability to meet your educational aspirations but usually plays a small factor in how much they can or will drag your goals through the mud. Kind of the opposite of friends really. See, and you always knew that your boss was the opposite of a friend, didn't you?
- 5.) Your kids can play a factor. Of course your kids hold sway in your life, but they should respect your desire to go to school or if nothing else, respect you enough to leave you alone when you need time for school. More often than not your spouse will have to pick up the slack here, or a good friend, or family, etc. Again, kids are generally not going to be a big contributor to your cause but can be a big drain on you if you do not adequately prepare.
- 6.) Coworkers can be an influence. Your coworkers are likely not going to be a big support for you other than maybe just someone to talk to. They can however cause you to second guess yourself, ruin your mood or just spread negativity to you. As such, being that they can contribute little but detract much treat this relationship accordingly.
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About Cajun
Cajun is 31-years-old and currently employed as a Project Analyst for an Information Technology department at a major financial firm. He has recently changed careers after spending 7 years in Federal Law enforcement of which he spent 5 years as a supervisor. His management experience combined with the MBA he finished in October, 2008 allowed for a career change even in the face of these uncertain economic times.
Cajun was introduced to the concept of distance education while working full-time as a law enforcement officer with a demanding and unpredictable schedule, obtaining an Associate of Science degree in Criminal Justice from
Ashworth College, a Bachelor of Science degree in Criminal Justice from Southwestern College of Winfield, KS graduating Magna Cum Laude and a Master of Business Administration with an emphasis in Organizational Leadership from
Ashford University. To further his new career Cajun will be working towards a Master of Science in Management of Information Systems with an emphasis in Project Management from
Bellevue University.